


Where the Heart Is

by alittlebitoftheuniverse



Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Don't hate it, Family, Gen, I'm kinda proud of this one tbh, SO, i've never tried something like this one before
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-16
Updated: 2018-03-16
Packaged: 2019-03-31 23:24:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,192
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13985514
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/alittlebitoftheuniverse/pseuds/alittlebitoftheuniverse
Summary: "The beach was empty, usually was at sunset, after the water had started to get colder and the tourists had found other places to be. Alex didn’t mind, he preferred it that way, sitting just out of reach of the lapping waves, watching how the sky went from blue to orange to pink, reflecting off the water until it looked like the sun was melting right into the sea, sinking below the waves and leaving behind a dusky purple and a small, slight boy hugging his knees to his chest on the sand."Alexander Hamilton in his old home.





	Where the Heart Is

**Author's Note:**

  * For [quantumoddity](https://archiveofourown.org/users/quantumoddity/gifts).



The beach was empty, usually was at sunset, after the water had started to get colder and the tourists had found other places to be. Alex didn’t mind, he preferred it that way, sitting just out of reach of the lapping waves, watching how the sky went from blue to orange to pink, reflecting off the water until it looked like the sun was melting right into the sea, sinking below the waves and leaving behind a dusky purple and a small, slight boy hugging his knees to his chest on the sand.

This was Alex’s favorite time of day, one of the few times his restless mind and heart grew quiet, where he could pretend that nothing was wrong and just enjoy the peace for a few precious minutes. He could watch the horizon, match his breathing to the steady rhythm of the tides, and feel safe. But all too soon, the light had faded almost completely, and he had to get home.

He ran barefoot through the sand, kicking it up behind him, enjoying the warmth of it, missing it when he reached the street, only bothering to put on his worn shoes to avoid stepping on a broken bottle. His mama had made him promise to be more careful after the last time. His feet dragged as he headed back to his house, back to the shouting and the looks and his father’s breath thick with the scent of alcohol. He braced himself as he went up the stairs of their store to the little apartment, pausing outside the door to listen, to see how bad it was tonight. Instead, he was greeted with silence.

His blood ran cold, a million terrified thoughts running through his head. Something had happened to Mama, his father had finally done something awful, or taken her away and left Alex behind. His hand shook as he reached for the doorknob, he had to fumble with it for a moment before it opened, he was surprised to find it unlocked. Inside, it was curiously quiet as his eyes frantically scanned the room, wondering what had happened, why couldn’t he hear voices, what had gone wrong.

And then he heard singing.

“Mama?” he called, following the sound of her voice to her room. She was making up the bed, her long thick curls were pulled back in a scarf, and she smiled when he came stumbling in.

“There you are,  _ mijo, _ I thought I heard you.” She kissed his head, still humming gently as she went back to smoothing the blankets. Alex didn’t move.

“Mama?” he said hesitantly. “Where’s…?”

“I don’t know,” she said, not sounding particularly bothered by the fact. “Not here.”

Alex frowned at her, more scared than he’d been before. “Mama…”

She sighed, some of the exhaustion still showing in her eyes as she turned to him. “You father...he’s gone, Alexander. He won’t be back...at least, I don’t think so.”

“Gone?” Alex repeated blankly. “Gone where?”

“I really don’t know that,” she murmured, holding his face and stroking his hair gently in the way she always did when she knew he was worried. “I thought he’d just gone out while I was working, but…” She gave a heavy sigh. “His things are gone. He won’t be back.”

Alex bit his lip, trying to sort out the emotions tumbling around his chest. Relief. Excitement, even. Regret? No.

“So...it’s just us now?” he said hopefully, looking around at their room, his mama’s room now.

“It’s just us,” Rachel smiled, ruffling his black hair. “Go eat, there’s still dinner on the stove, it’ll be warm. And then you can help me finish cleaning up.”

Alex grinned at her, he couldn’t help it, hugging her tightly before he went scurrying off to the kitchen, marveling at how much lighter his feet felt. Things would be better now. They’d be okay, he knew they would. Not easy, he figured, never easy. But still. They’d be all right.

 

***

 

A small, slight man gazed out at the ocean, standing in the surf and letting the waves tug at his feet. It had been an age since he stood here, on this beach, and watching the sun melt into the ocean, setting it ablaze with light and what seemed like warmth, though the chilly water around his ankles told him the truth. 

He took a deep breath, one that felt like he’d been holding onto for ages. Years, really, since he’d left. It was hard coming back here, but he’d known that when he booked the flight. He’d known when he’d walked by the building that was his old home, older and abandoned now, but he’d still recognized it, the address had never left his mind. He’d known it would hurt to walk every inch of his old home but he did it anyway, sometimes with a hand in his, sometimes by himself, remembering. This was where Mama used to take him for new clothes. This was where he’d found his pet snake. This was where he’d stood after the hurricane. It hurt, it was hard, but it felt good, to visit these places, to tell them hello, smile (sometimes fondly, sometimes bitterly) and let them go, let the ghosts leave him with every step.

This was the only place he’d had left to visit, he’d known that and saved it for last. This was where he’d been on the most wonderful day, this was where he’d come after the worst day, and every day in between. This, more than anywhere in this town, was his home.

Alex felt his throat grow tight as he stared over the water to the horizon. This, of all places, was the hardest to let go of. It wasn’t that he’d never come back, he felt certain he would, someday. Maybe, when his children were grown and had lives of their own, when he was retired, he and Eliza would come back here, buy his mother’s old shop and run it for themselves, placing good memories over the bad.

He gave a shaky sigh, closing his eyes for a count of three, jumping when a hand slipped into his.

“Only me,” came Eliza’s voice, low and soothing and reminding Alex of the tides. “AJ said he saw you headed this way, I thought I’d come join you.”

“Hey,” Alex sighed, feeling a smile tug at his lips the way it did every time he looked at her. “Sorry, I was just…”

“Worlds away,” Eliza finished with a smile of her own, leaning in to kiss his cheek. “You okay?”

Alex returned her kiss before hugging her close, gazing out over the water again, the waters that had taken him from his island, all the way to New York, to so many things he’d never thought he would have. He thought of his mama, her bright eyes and long curly hair and the way she’d smile if she could see him now. When he spoke, it was as much to her as it was to Eliza.

“Yeah,” he nodded, feeling some grip in his heart release. “I’m all right.”

And he was.

**Author's Note:**

> Hey, I hope you guys liked this! I'm @childofdustandashes on tumblr if you want to come yell with me about musicals and history, and comments are my lifeblood, so please leave one if you enjoyed this fic!


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